Lesson

I just learnt this isn’t a popularity contest but rather an indulgence. I could blame my athletic affiliations and the competitiveness they’ve ingrained into me or the need to be socially adept. Or how average wasn’t acceptable where I come from, you had to be good at everything. Sad really, I grew up being different and now I care about things that everyone else does. Or I just pretend to. Actually I’ve stopped thinking and I go with whatever’s going on. I used to love reading about mythology, history and other wooly subjects. I adored “useless” information (useless=not textbook related). I loved to learn. It didn't need to have a purpose or use; it was the end in itself. I’ve changed.

Social butterfly I never was, and right now I don’t really know what I am. But it’s not something I’m very proud of. I made a better kid than I am an adult. Now I’m merely part of the crowd. The reds faded and has been contaminated. I thought it was a good thing; I certainly have more “friends” now than I did at school. Maybe I blend in better too. You would love having me at your dinner table; I can be charming when I want to be.

Maybe life got to me, or I just couldn't live up to myself. Enid Blyton taught me right and wrong. She would be disappointed. In some ways I have improved as a person, but I know I can do so much better. I owe that to so many wonderful people around me.

A dull, faded red blends well with other colors. A vibrant one stood on its own.

I learnt something. About me.